March 25, 2005

Come to think of it, I’m surprised no enterprising gay man has yet come up with a mood handkerchief.

True, the golden days of the hanky code are long past, the code itself having been rendered all but obsolete by the arrival of the internet as a tool for men to find appropriate sexual partners, but still, how fabulous would it be to wander around with a handkerchief in your pocket that changed from gray flannel (suits) to terrycloth (bathhouses) to brown lace (cut) to brown satin (uncut), depending on what you were in the mood for?

Trickier would be the mechanism by which the handkerchief could change from the right pocket to the left and back, indicating a change from desire to bottom to desire to top and back.

But then again I don’t know how much call there could possibly be for such a feature, so maybe we’re okay.

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9 Responses to Come to think of it,

  1. Jess says:

    Okay, what brought you to that? Yes, I see the connection to the mood ring post, but I think, perhaps, someone has a little too much time on his hands.

  2. Marc says:

    Faustus, dear, I didn’t think you were old enough to know all the hanky lingo!

  3. anapestic says:

    Well. It’s obvious that you’re dying to be asked and that no one else is rude enough to gratify you, so let me. What color does your mood ring turn during sex, anyway?

  4. i. bendito says:

    Would independent multicolor brake lights do it?

  5. Rob says:

    The very, very first bar I ever wandered into (by accident! is this a gay bar?) had a hanky code bulletin board sort of thing that explained it all. I forgot to take notes, and thus never learned it.

  6. Christopher says:

    Oh my! I would be very worried about getting the shade of colour right because a simple mistake could be a disaster!

    Aside from that I have a practical question regarding the fur option. Presumably the wearer (displaying on the right) is alerting someone or rather something to the fact that one is a bestial bottom? Are animals really that clever?

  7. Andy says:

    I think now I finally understand Michael Jackson’s armband system.

  8. jon collins says:

    hmm… a hypercolor hanky? Surely some enterprising scientist can figure out a way to figure out what someone wants based on their body temperature.

  9. perry says:

    That’s funny as hell. What if one wants to simultaneously top & btm? A hanky that can fission itself into both pockets at once?

    Wandered into your site somehow (i forget exactly how it happened now) and enjoyed some ’02 posts about orgy conversation etiquette, etc, as well as current stuff… Nice writing!!

    Oops, my end of sentence ellipsis had only 3 dots … and they tend to also have no space before … unless they’re in the middle of sentence fragment driblets like this one … which means … at least i’m aware of proper grammar rules before making up my own. =)


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