May 18, 2007

With a great deal of concentrated effort, I have managed to translate most of the hieroglyphs in the ancient Egyptian final exam I posted a couple weeks ago. Here’s what I have so far.

“Please let me _____ your _____,” he begged, lost in lust. “I need your young stud _____ so bad, please give it to me.” I was only too happy to oblige. I ______ all ___ inches down his throat, mercilessly _______(ing) his face, my low-hanging _____ slapping his chin. ‘Officer, you sure do know your way around a _______,’ I moaned as his tongue ________ all over my _____, sucking gently on the head and ____________________ as his hands plied my heavy _______.”

I’m having a little trouble with the blanks; I think I need to get a more comprehensive dictionary.

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17 Responses to With a great deal of concentrated effort, I have managed to translate

  1. signalite says:

    I love Ancient Egyptian Mad Libs.

  2. LaunderLust says:

    Oh, I get it! The dreaded ancient Egyption HEIROGLIBS!

  3. LaunderLust says:

    Ok, so before you block my comments forever, please accept my apology for misspelling “Egyptian.” And I meant “HIEROGLIBS.” This is the LAST blog on which I’d ever want to make these types of mistakes. . . .

  4. Teddy says:

    I applaud your diligence, Faustus. It must originally have seemed cruel for your professor to give you an inscription written from the top perspective, but the purpose of education, after all, is to expand the mind.

  5. eric says:

    Is Michael Lucas Egpytian? And also from the BC era?

  6. Jeff says:

    First timer to your blog, looking forward to reading much more. Reading and want to say thanks for smacking the Phelps cult!


  7. Chuck says:


    Seemed way too easy. Was this a trick quiz?

  8. lee says:

    No, no Chuck. Remember, Egyptian is usually read from top to bottom and left to right. Fill in the blanks that way and it would say, “Please let me cock your pounding,” which would make just no sense at all. But if Faustus is the top, the world must have lost its magnetic bearings anway so I guess it wouldn’t matter too much.

  9. Jess says:

    Suddenly, I feel like studying ancient Egyptian.

  10. Paul says:

    Ooh… those naughty egyptians.

  11. Sin says:

    I suspect that it’s not the dictionary you’re lacking, it’s the ability to conceptualise why in the world anyone in any era or language would inscribe a narrative about being a top. 😀

  12. chris says:

    hieroglibs! good one!

  13. David says:

    You’d think they would have tried to be more concise with their ideogrammatic erotica. You’d run out of daylight before you got past translating the foreplay.

  14. Snoskred says:

    Hi, it’s Snoskred here. I’m just dropping by to let you know that I read your blog with google reader whenever you update, and that I enjoy your blog. I’m re-doing my links on my blog, and I have linked to you in the sidebar.

    I used to love madlibs. I once found somewhere you could play them online but I forget where now.. 😉

  15. Megan says:

    have a lick of, low fat yogurt, Cherry Garcia low fat frozen yogurt, it strange the way he wanted to hold he cone but I forced, 3, adding scoop after scoop until they slid onto, napkin, cone, missed the yogurt causing it to fall, clean floor, sides of the cone, tub of low fat frozen yogurt,

  16. Caramello says:

    Did you complete knitting the rainbow hot pants?

    This is most likely coming off a little creepy. I apologise.

    Did you though? Because I’m slightly-a-little-bit-kind-of-very-much obsessed with the idea of these marvellous pants being worn during a step class.

    I was also curious as to how itchy they may have been and what yarn you used?

  17. goblinbox says:

    I admire your sticktoitiveness. I really do.

    Can’t wait to see the final results!


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