July 19, 2006

A couple weeks ago I posted a request for copies of Us, In Touch, and Life & Style, along with a promise to explain why I wanted them.

A promise fulfilled late is better than a promise never fulfilled, so I will reveal that I wanted them so that I could prepare for an audition to be one of the co-hosts of this:

Picture 5.png

Unfortunately, the producers decided not to call me back for a second audition.

They’ll pay.

Bookmark the permalink.

13 Responses to A couple weeks ago I posted a request for copies of Us, In Touch

  1. raph says:

    be happy. this gives you a reason to put ‘hire assassins’ on your to-do list.

  2. Pam says:

    Pah, you would have been brilliant on that show. They are losers.

  3. Mike says:

    Faustus, I know they should, and will pay, for standing in your way towards world domination, but in my opinion you are clearly headliner material, not a sidekick. After all, why go to all the bother of getting a sidekick gig if you just have start immediately with the “All About Eve” manipulation and betrayal?

  4. Dave says:

    Those rotten, untalented hacks. They’ve got some nerve…

  5. Alden says:


    Start your own. The selling point of course is where random audience members get to stuff dollar bills in your socks. 🙂

  6. Jeffrey says:

    Joan Rivers? Would you really want to stoop that low?

    And besides, I just downgraded my cable subscription, and if you’d gotten this I would have had to upgrade all over again.

  7. Crash says:

    Clearly they couldn’t hire you. Joan couldn’t have held a candle to you and they have to make sure the host looks good.

    If they’d been really smart, they would have fired Joan and made you the host.

  8. phag says:

    Most unfortunate. Foolish, in fact. I’ll surely never watch it without you.

  9. Rob7534 says:

    Terrible news!

    But they couldn’t hire someone who would have CLEARLY upstaged Joan. Now you wouldn’t have to pretend to be nice to Melissa.

  10. will says:

    Maybe you should develop your own show. And maybe instead of Bravo (because they obviously have no taste) you could sell it to LOGO, aka, “Bravo-Lite.” And you know, I’m not entirely kidding here.

  11. Aidan says:

    Of COURSE they didn’t call you back. Your schayne punnem next to Joan Rivers’ Apple Annie head? People would have thought it was a remake of Waylon and Madame. Plus she probably has it in her contract that her co-host can’t weigh less than she does. They will have to hire a man who looks older and scarier than Joan Rivers — maybe Michael jackson or Fay Dunaway.

  12. David says:

    You know on your audition card they wrote “will draw focus from Joan.”

    That and “natural redhead?”

  13. Pingback: The Search for Love in Manhattan

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *