The contest entries will be posted anon.
In the meantime, I am in Seattle, where a theater is holding auditions for a presentation of a musical of mine in two months. This is actually the first time I’ve sat through auditions for a piece of mine–if I’m involved I usually just call people and ask them to do it, and if I’m not involved I usually just show up near the end of rehearsals and act happy with the people they’ve cast, whether I am or not–and I spent all day yesterday being shocked.
The first thing that shocked me after a day of auditions was the discovery that, when directors and producers tell actors, “You were terrific, you’re just not right for this role,” they actually mean it. They’re not just blowing them off condescendingly. In addition to the many people who would be really good in the roles for which they were auditioning, we saw many more people I would cast in a heartbeat in other roles in other shows, but not this one, with terrific voices and/or winning stage presences and/or really great pecs. It was difficult for me to say we shouldn’t call back the people with that last quality, especially as I’m sure the theater could have located a sofa somewhere for a hastily improvised casting couch, but in the end my devotion to my show carried the day.
The second thing that shocked me was looking at the list of male candidates at the end of the day and realizing with a start that next to about half the names I had written the words “too gay.”
I feel I should report myself to GLAAD or something.
Though really, if you’re delivering a paean to a nineteen-year-old girl’s breasts beneath her ragged blouse, there’s only a certain amount of lisping an audience can accept before suspension of disbelief becomes impossible to maintain.
I feel your pain.
I have contacted GLAAD and reported you.
I think you mean GLAAD. GLAD fights for marriage equality in New England states.
too gay? *bitch slaps you!*
Although it seems shocking at the time, the words “too gay” twice appeared on forms I was reviewing during auditions. Once was for a contemporary a cappella group with which I sang, and the other was for a production of Chicago that I was music directing. In both cases, my colleagues looked at me as though I had lost my mind, and in both cases I was in college. I can blame my bravado on youth; what’s your excuse?
If you’re uncomfortable writing “too gay” — or more importantly, don’t want other people to see — try “NACH” — “Not A Convincing Heterosexual.”
“my devotion to my show carried the day”
Um, your devotion to E.S. didn’t?
Just so no one thinks I’m a complete jerk, there was a “wink” at the end of my comment, but I enclosed it within the brackets that are used for HTML tags, so it didn’t show up. I truly do love me some Faustus.
I hope you didn’t turn anyone down just because they had peanut butter in their hair.
If you are uncomfortable with “too gay” how about the word faggy. “Too faggy.” Maybe not.
Did you really, truly, actually write “too gay” in your notes? Because that is hysterical.
I’ve always assumed the notes directors were writing during auditions were utterly dry.
Hey,
Let me know next time you’re in Seattle. I’d love to see you if I’m in town (may move to Asia sometime this year). I think the last time I saw you was at birdfarm’s wedding?
Hey,
Let me know next time you’re in Seattle. I’d love to see you if I’m in town (may move to Asia sometime this year). I think the last time I saw you was at birdfarm’s wedding?
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