April 15, 2005

First order of business: I must add him, him, and her to the list of people to whom I owe a debt of gratitude for their boundless generosity in suggesting publicity avenues for my upcoming book. I would offer you all free sex, even the girl, but my boyfriend has forbidden me.

Second order of business: everyone must go here to see the 50s movie Are You Popular?, a brilliant coup de cinéma that has forced me to reevaluate my entire approach to socializing. Evidently my parking in cars with the boys at night, which I had previously thought was the key to popularity, has actually been getting in my way the whole time. Thanks to her for the link. I would offer you free sex, but it wouldn’t make any sense.

Third order of business: as of yesterday, I am New York Sports Club’s newest group fitness instructor. Hardly surprising, given my recent triumph, but pleasing nonetheless. I’ll be teaching this Saturday at 23rd and Park at 9:30 (step) and 10:30 (sculpt), if anybody wants to come by. I would offer you free sex, but I can’t imagine any of you will be up before noon.

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4 Responses to First order of business: I

  1. The One Who Asked About The Cookie Recipe says:

    Dear Faustus,

    I hope that you do not end up like Belle de Jour. She wrote a fantastic blog for a year, got a publishing deal and promptly stopped blogging. I sincerely hope that, regardless of the (inevitable) success of your book, you will continue blogging.

    Alex.

  2. Jess says:

    Congratulations, Faustus!

  3. Brian says:

    Hopefully the 23rd and Park NYSC is just a stepping stone, Dr. Faustus, because I recall all the hot guys work out at the west side locations.

  4. Lauren says:

    I totally forgot about that! I loved that movie. Eesh.

    I would congratulate you about the fitness classes, but the address of that gym is much, much too close to the place I worked last summer, and I’m too busy cringing in horror at the memory.

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