September 20, 2002

This is my dilemma: I knitted E.S. a sock before I broke up with him.

Two weeks ago he moved to Boston, where I used to live, so I know how cold it is. I decided to knit him a pair of socks to keep his feet warm (because, after all, even though he is not my true love, I feel warmly towards him). However, knitting a pair of socks turned out to take a lot longer than I expected it to, and I was only able to finish one before he left. So I gave him a sock and an IOU.

My plan was to finish the companion sock, send it to him, and then break up with him. He pressed the issue, however, forcing me to break up with him before I finished the sock.

I figure these are my options:

1) finish the sock and send it to him—he is, after all, the intended recipient, and the fact that I broke up with him doesn’t change that;
2) finish the sock, get the yarn to make another, matching sock, and keep the pair for myself, since, after all, it’s a pretty groovy pattern; or
3) finish the sock and get the yarn to make another, matching pair for my soul mate, whoever he is.

The problem, of course, is sizing. E.S. wears a size 11 shoe. I wear a size 7.5. I have no idea what size my soul mate wears. If I finish the sock now, it’ll fit me; if I keep going, it’ll fit E.S.

If I leave it unfinished, perhaps it will act as a beacon to my soul mate, calling him to me as surely as a siren on the shore.

Of course, it’s entirely possible that by the time he reaches me I will have lost the pattern or forgotten how to knit entirely.

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4 Responses to This is my dilemma: I

  1. Anonymous says:

    My view of “premeptive wishes” is that they are very bad. If you do anything to “propitiate” the arrival of your soulmate, something will come to ward him off. Learn to expect your soulmate by pretending you never knew such things as soulmates even existed. Then his “aura” will be teased into wanting to show you how wrong you were. So never knit your soulmate anything. Keep going as though you were still bound to your promise to ES. Besides, it’s so good for the soul to show endurance and comittment vis-a-vis unavoidable odds. That too propitiates your soulmate.

    Now isn’t this a pile of gibberish? I just love your blog.
    Strether

    Reply
  2. PatCH says:

    I say make the second sock and send it. Don’t do it for your sake, don’t do it for ES’s sake. Do it, instead, for the first sock’s sake. Think of how miserable it must be, all alone in a drawer full of paired socks, looking for its partner.

    Reply
  3. RM says:

    I had a horrible thought. What if the sock is not sitting alone in a drawer somewhere, but instead is sitting alone in a landfill somewhere, having been discarded by ES into the trash in a fit of rage/despair after being dumped by Faustus.

    Then knitting the second sock and sending to ES will be a huge waste.

    Reply
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