Tonight while watching TV:
E.S.: Team Jacob and Team Edward? What’s that about?
FAUSTUS: It’s New Moon, honey.
E.S.: What’s that?
FAUSTUS: …
E.S.: …
FAUSTUS: How can you live in this country and not know?
E.S.: I don’t know, I just don’t.
FAUSTUS (sighing longsufferingly): New Moon is the second movie in the Twilight series, sweetheart. Edward is the heartthrob of the vampires and Jacob is the heartthrob of the werewolves.
E.S.: Hey, that’s not a bad idea.
FAUSTUS: Jesus Christ.
E.S.: It is a bad idea?
FAUSTUS: I don’t believe this.
E.S.: I’m so old.
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