Last year, upon the publication of Swish, I had a gay-off. Since my quest to become the gayest person ever had failed, I explained, the post was still available, and whoever wrote in with the most convincing explanations would win prizes.
Well, I’m having another one this year.
Since, like our founding father George Washington I cannot tell a lie, I must confess that I have yet to mail the prizes from last year’s gay-off. There’s a very specific reason for this, however, which won’t apply this year; last year’s prizes involved brownies, and every time I make the brownies to send out I end up eating them all. I have high hopes that at some point this year the winners of last year’s gay-off will receive their prizes, and I promise that this year things will be different.
So here are the rules: Send me an e-mail about the gayest thing you did as a child. Note, please, that you needn’t be gay to enter. Technically you must have at some point in your existence been a child, but I won’t be checking rigorously.
The winner of the gay-off will receive an inscribed copy of Swish and either a knitted hat or a knitted penis cozy (his or her choice). The runner-up will receive either an inscribed copy of Swish, a knitted hat, or a knitted penis cozy (his or her choice). The deadline for entry is July 15 at 11:59 p.m.
May the gayest person win!