May 25, 2006

It is my greatest dream in life to throw a drink in somebody’s face.

Actually, that’s not true. Throwing a drink in somebody’s face is only my second-greatest dream in life; my greatest dream in life is to become an arsonist.

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24 Responses to It is my greatest dream in life to throw a drink in somebody’s

  1. Joe says:

    Gosh, what happened to “book world darling”, “musical theater gadfly” or even “celebrated dick dancer”?

  2. Been there, done that. Extremely satisfying!


  3. Jeffrey says:

    Then you must throw your drink in someone’s face, then light him (or her) on fire, thus realizing two dreams at once.

    Synergy, my dear. Synergy.

  4. anapestic says:

    Jeffrey has a point, but it would be easier simply to throw a flaming Sambuca in someone’s face.

  5. Adam875 says:

    You could throw a highly flammable drink in the face of a smoker.

  6. Alden says:

    I knew it. You are Count Olaf, aren’t you.

  7. Sarwat says:

    I once threw a cup of water at someone’s face. After a volleyball tournament. It was an exhilirating experience.

  8. Logan says:

    Whichever method you choose to fulfill these two dreams, you should look into acquiring an amanuensis to document the entire experience.

  9. Uncle Zoloft says:

    I thought your were working out the arson thing by go-go dancing.

  10. liveinlove says:

    This is my first visit to your site, and this is the first post I’ve ever read of yours. I think I’m totally hooked. also – ME TOO!

  11. campbell says:

    I’m getting deja vu here.

    How did you like Lavi?

  12. Lynn says:

    Are these dreams or impulses. Sometimes I want to punch pregnant ladies in the stomach–does that count?

  13. Sin says:

    I’ve thrown a drink in someone’s face and then set him on fire. Does that work for you? Because it’s really easy as long as brandy’s involved.

  14. Ruby says:

    I’ve thrown a drink in someone’s face before. Sadly, it wasn’t as satisfying as I thought it would be.

    However, I am willing to do it again as soon the ‘moment’ happens.

  15. will says:

    Sometimes the wanting is better than the having.

  16. Andy says:

    But what would you burn?

    I think my dream is to have a real orgy before I get too old and have to pay for it.

  17. I was going to say the “light a drink on fire, then throw” thing, but someone beat me to it. Damn.

  18. Jay says:

    Actually, you can combine both into a profitable career. Throw the drink, then throw a match.

    You ARE talking about being a fire bug, aren’t you? I hope I haven’t confused between an arsonist and an arsenist again! Mercy!

  19. roy says:

    is it still arson if you’re lighting a person?

  20. scottk says:

    I actually smacked a guy across the face in a gay bar once. He called a very good friend of mine a whore. It was a very Crystal Carrington moment.

  21. David says:

    Dreams don’t die, so keep an eye on your dreams.

  22. goblinbox says:

    I adore arson!

    Arsonists I’m a bit lukewarm about.

  23. Craig says:

    Why, you’re not Faustus. What have you done with him?

  24. Headbang8 says:

    Jay is right. You can combine the two. Stage fore-eaters use brandy.


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