November 30, 2004

Is this thing on?

This is David, proprietor of everyone

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23 Responses to Is this thing on? This

  1. Jess says:

    Well, I certainly enjoy it, but I guess I prefer anal sex. It’s more intense for me.

  2. Manogirl says:

    Dear David, will you be my boyfriend? I know you don’t like girls and all, but I think you are the only man who I have ever heard or seen express that opinion. For example, my boyfriend can’t get enough of it. How do I get him to feel the same way you do?

  3. Anonymous says:

    use teeth

  4. Jay says:

    I think the problem is that most people simply aren’t very good at giving head.

    Now rimming… even a novice can make it good. And an expert can send you skyrocketing.

    -shudders while fantasising at work-

  5. Anonymous says:

    No, David, you are one of two men in the world not thrilled by the prospect of receiving oral sex. The other one is someone I dated several years ago. It’s too bad he was an asshole in every single other way.

  6. jon collins says:

    Has baltimore destroyed you so? I’m inclined to agree with Jay however. Most guys are lousy, even the ones who say “oh every guy says I’m the best he’s had in years.” I find that I’ve said that to even the toothiest bj… I can’t bear to tell someone that they’re miserable at what makes them so happy. It’s like telling a struggling actor who’s waited tables for 10 years that it’s not that they’re too short… just too short on talent.

  7. Don says:

    Oral sex definitely works for me anytime of the day thank you.

  8. Nan says:

    A voice from the lesbian contigent… oral sex is not my favorite… I find it a little boring… ok a lot boring…

  9. phil says:

    Blowjobs are definitely my least favorite thing in the bedroom. There are a few times when I really want to suck dick but for the most part my attitude is ‘you don’t have to do that if you don’t want to.’ And then there’s the matter of hands, where do you put your hands?

  10. Pat says:

    How exciting to see you here, though Fautus is missed.

    Oral sex…I’m not big on getting it, but I will give it. I think I don’t like getting it because I find it hard to feign excitment, and the sensations are just plain weird.

  11. Frank says:

    Well, once… I was on speed, which makes you hyper-sensitive, and this guy blew me for close to an hour, gently, only with his lips… but other than that, it’s all about the prostate. Enough said.

  12. Tin Man says:

    Well, there are two aspects to receiving oral sex. Besides the sensations you feel from the guy’s mouth, there’s also the visual excitement of seeing someone go down on you. I think the visual is almost as exciting as the tactical.

  13. Tin Man says:

    Er, tactile. Though good tactics are also important.

  14. Brian says:

    For me, oral sex is only good when there’s something layered on top of it. Such as ten guys watching you get blown in the sauna at the gym. Or hoping your trick’s boyfriend doesn’t come home in the middle of it. Not that I’ve ever done that more than five times.

    Otherwise, oral sex is a snooze, and I’m glad to see I’m not a freak for thinking so!

  15. john in denver says:

    They suck!
    I like to give ‘em, not get ‘em.

  16. i. bendito says:

    Tin Man, didn’t you mean to write testicle?

  17. sigazze says:

    another voice from the lesbian contingent. i like it- giving and getting. but fucking is even better. however.. all of it is a total waste of time unless the person knows how to talk in bed.

  18. campbell says:

    At last, David, you have exposed the great myth that oral sex is everyone’s dream. Frankly my dear, it is a bore altough giving is marginally better than getting. At least when you are giving you don’t have to fake ecstatic pleasure.

  19. hot toddy says:

    I though talking about sex was “oral sex” but this post makes me think I may be missing something.

  20. joe says:

    What a bunch of bottoms!

  21. David says:

    Do you really think it’s an issue of topness vs. bottomness? I consider myself rather versatile on that continuum, and yet I still have this indifference to receiving oral sex. Again, I don’t dislike it, but I just don’t feel as if it’s worthy of the hype. If it inherently felt better, or maybe just if it were easier to be good at it, I might feel differently.

  22. orbicon says:

    I always get a toothy BJ. It’s horrible. Maybe I’m just too big, I dunno. I’m not into recieving oral sex as much. I would rather make out.

  23. Pam says:

    Yet another lesbian chiming in : not my favourite thing either, getting or giving. I much prefer having somebody to hold onto.

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