December 4, 2003

How could I possibly have gained three pounds yesterday when I didn’t eat anything?

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13 Responses to How could I possibly have

  1. Dr.P says:

    1) You gained muscle instead.

    2)An air bubble in your gastrointestinal tract that is weighing you down.

    3)Your scale is off.

    4)Too many things in your pocket, shoes are too heavy, wearing too much bling bling while stepping on the scale.

    5)Water retention…oh wait. That ones for me.

    Reply
  2. cfsph says:

    I’m so sorry Faustie. I was going to make a petty comment about extra-curricular activities and colonic irrigation, but I can feel your heartbreak and it purged the evil in my heartless soul. God bless your weight fetish.

    Reply
  3. Jalal says:

    You didnt eat anything all day ? Why?

    Reply
  4. Adam875 says:

    You know everyone’s weight fluctuates naturally, right? They say dieters shouldn’t weigh themselves every day, as the pound or three natural difference will just make you crazy. Oh, wait…

    Reply
  5. Buni says:

    You probably just need a good dump.

    Reply
  6. Deidre says:

    How the hell did you make it through an entire day without eating anything!? Are you depressed?

    Stupid question. On some level, we’re always depressed…

    Reply
  7. since Dr.P pretty covered all the possibities, i have to agree with Buni 😉

    Reply
  8. thyris says:

    putting on weight is inevitable unless you start the day with a model’s breakfast – 500mL of evian followed by a fag.

    Reply
  9. Crash says:

    Could I skip the Evian and just have the fag? Preferably a cute one.

    Reply
  10. Patrick says:

    Now you should remember to always eat “a well balanced breakfast.” Otherwise you could get dizzy and NYC has too many dizzy queens already. If your pants fit…you are fine.

    Reply
  11. Wayne says:

    ………… I skipped lunch and dinner on Wednesday.

    I didn’t loose weight.

    Then I had full breakfast, lunch and dinner on Thursday.

    This morning, I found out that I have lost 1 lbs.

    Weird.

    Reply
  12. Farid says:

    What did you eat the night before?

    Reply
  13. sam says:

    Because G-d is trying to tell you that you should eat something already.

    Reply

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