So three interesting-seeming guys have responded to my ad at gayjews.net. I called them all yesterday, left messages, and then instantly lost all desire to meet any of themor, for that matter, anybody else, ever again.
I am utterly baffled by this paradigm shift.
Perhaps my subconscious, having watched me make a total mess of my search for love, is taking over and following the lead of the eponymous Carmen in Bizet’s opera:
L’oiseau que tu croyais surprendre
Battit de l’aile et s’envola.
L’amour est loin, tu peux l’attendre;
Tu ne l’attends plus, il est là!
Tout autour de toi, vite, vite,
Il vient, s’en va, puis il revient.
Tu crois le tenir, il t’évite;
Tu crois l’éviter, il te tient.
The bird you thought to take by surprise
Beat his wings and flew away.
Love is far away, you can wait for him;
You stop waiting, and he’s there!
All around you, quickly, quickly,
He comes, he goes, he comes back.
You think you have him, he escapes you;
You think you’ve escaped him, he has you.
I can only hope my subconscious knows enough to diverge from Carmen’s path before my lover stabs me to death at a bull fight.