This morning I woke up to find a chewed up piece of gum stuck in my ass hair.
Last night I had a lovely date, but no stretch of the imagination allows me to understand how this could have happened, since neither one of us took any clothes off. And, for that matter, neither one of us chewed any gum.
My ass does not chew gum, either.
Forgive me for the grossness of this post, but I am afraid of what the universe might be trying to tell me.