I finally posted my Drip personal ad. (If you don’t know the back story for this one, read the original post before continuing—this will be very confusing otherwise.)
I quote my ad here, verbatim, in its entirety.
age: 29 (born Jan. 12, 1973)
interests: civil rights, chocolate, the undead
neighborhood: Mr. Rogers’
favorite vacation spot: the Land of Nod
favorite time of day: Actually, I prefer parsley, sage, and rosemary.
favorite drink at Drip: Oreo milkshake
musical preference:the soundtrack to Powertool 2.
biggest turn-on: revolution and wonder. Also when a cute guy licks my ears.
biggest turn-off: avarice of spirit, poor spelling
ideal weekend plans: go to Venice, spend a carefree weekend among the canals, and return to find my enemies gone to rack and ruin
typical weekend plans: play with my dog, wish I were important enough to have enemies
looks: matter/don’t matter/shouldn’t matter but they do Oh, Mary, please.
self-description: [Refer to "about me" section on the right-hand side of the blog. There are only so many amusing things I have to say about myself.] Also, I am [height suppressed], [weight suppressed], [hair color suppressed], and a bottom.
So that’s done, graven in photocopied and laminated paper, as it were.
With my luck, the guy I was after with this will find some unpardonable solecism in my Middle Egyptian and be totally turned off.
Either that or he will have fallen madly in love since placing his ad and moved with his partner to Saskatchewan.