February 15, 2002

Today I went to Barnes & Noble and nosed around in the children’s section. I saw a book in the “contemporary issues” section (ages 5-8) called When Someone in the Family Drinks Too Much.

It was about bears.

There was a Baby Bear, a Mama Bear, and an alcoholic Papa Bear. My favorite page had the following captions: “When someone in the family drinks too much, it can affect his family, his health, and even his work.” For family there was a picture of drunk Papa Bear yelling at Mama Bear and Baby Bear. For health there was a picture of drunk Papa Bear in bed with a thermometer in his mouth and fever lines drawn coming out of his head. But the best was work, for which there was a picture of drunk Papa Bear in a business suit, kneeling down in the bathroom with his head in the toilet.

Actually, this happened six years ago in Wordsworth Books, but the rest of it is all true.

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