All right, so here’s the deal.
I’m using the imminent release of Swish: My Quest to Become the Gayest Person Ever as a spur to develop an e-mailing list, in order to keep people informed about future projects*. In the lower left corner of your computer screen you will notice the means to sign up. I intend to send out updates only when there’s a very good reason to do so (I have another book coming out, I have a show going up, I’ve been abducted by aliens). I can’t imagine this will be more than once a month or so; probably less often.
As an incentive, I’ll be drawing three names at random from the list in a week or so (April 14 or just after). The bearers of those three names will be doomed to receive signed copies of the galleys of Swish. (Galleys are the low-rent paperback version of the book that gets sent out to reviewers long before I’ve finished editing.)
This means that, if you sign up, then when the actual book is released you have the chance to be able to compare the two and mock me for 1) having made idiotic choices before fixing them and/or 2) making idiotic fixes when something was better in the first place. I will hate you for mocking me, but that hatred will be trumped by my intense desire for approval, so I won’t say anything to you about it.
Now come on, with a setup like that, how can you not join the list?
*(For “to keep people informed about future projects,” read “to get an exact count of how many people like me so that I can both fill the gaping maw of need that is the core of my being and want to kill myself because it’s not more.”)
Done! That was so easy.
I’m prepared to send money, cookie dough ice cream, or nudes to gain an unfair advantage.
Herr Doktor… My birthday falls on April 21st. I implore you, please give a literary balm to ease the pain of aging in my aching, weary bones…
Silly Faustus: everyone likes you. Some people just don’t know it yet.
So, you’re going to use the mailing list to let us know when you’ll be doing the hot Web cam shows, right?
Oh Joel, I’m so bird brained! After two emails to you, your mailing list is on your blog; Duh!
Forgive me. I was out very late last night with a woman, who was a type A personality without a plan B. I’m gonna RUN home after work, eat high-fat food and knit.
Oh! I would love to win a real galley and brag to everyone!
Huh. I always called those things ARCs. And funny how you didn’t succumb to the temptation of calling it an ARC since it’s a wonderful opportunity to make a pun on where they stow the Torah. And isn’t your book a sacred text? (I wanted to type “vain” in that box instead. Dammit!)
Did I WIN YET?!?