Okay, I am madly in love with the guy who wrote Underland. He posted sporadically but brilliantly up through February. Last night I stopped by to satisfy my need for bile—of which there seems to be precious little here in Los Angeles–and saw, to my shock and delight, that he posted something in June.
The thing is, there seems to be no way on his web site to contact him.
So if anybody knows who he is, can you please tell me, so I can get in touch with him and plead desperately with him to marry me?
Oh, you’re in love with everybody.
You’ve discovered my secret.
I know that this might sound strange, but I feel that there are huge parts of your life that you are leaving out of this blog.
I used to be madly in love with Faustus…then he broke my heart
Brian, awe, what happened? you never got your free sex?
Bad Faustus! Bad!
*spank* *spank* *spank*
Brian, I am at your disposal the instant I return to Manhattan. Faustus, Jr., you are correct. Since the entire purpose of this blog is to get as many people to love me as possible, I leave out anything that wouldn’t further that aim. However, I must say that, if I do indeed have a child (as your moniker would indicate), then there are huge parts of my life that I am leaving out not only of this blog but also of my conscious memory.