July 17, 2003

If my sitemeter statistics are to be trusted—and I am inclined to believe they are, especially as they never told me we had to attack Iraq because of the weapons of mass destruction apparently spilling out of every kitchen cupboard in that country—271 people have visited my blog today, and exactly one of them pledged to sponsor me in the blogathon.

I can think of three possible explanations for this:

1. The idea of sex with me is not as appealing as I imagined it would be. If this is the case, I will have to reevaluate what I’m doing here, because I don’t think I’m capable of being any wittier or more charming.

2. I wasn’t clear enough about the process. I do not see a dime of the money you pledge. It all goes to the Generator Theatre, a nascent not-for-profit theater company dedicated to developing and producing new and exciting musicals. It’s a good cause—perhaps not as profound as Doctors Without Borders or Amnesty International, but still worth your 25 bucks.

3. People don’t think I mean it.

I mean it.

Seriously—whether you’ve been a reader of my blog for a long time or have just tuned in recently, if you enjoy what I write I’d very much appreciate your making a pledge to sponsor me. I’d hate to think that the labor of sleeplessness I’ll be going through July 26-7 would be for $25. Plus I have a fabulous theme for my posts.

You can make a pledge here [link no longer active].

In the meantime, I hope he enjoys his free sex.

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13 Responses to If my sitemeter statistics are

  1. sam says:

    OR, we aren’t all cute boys (or are not sure of your stringent requirements). Or are too broke to pay for anything but food and an internet connection.

    Reply
  2. Phil says:

    I for one just found out about this, but am seriously wondering about the deadline for contributions. How long to I have to muse this over? Because, if I can think about it for awhile I’ll probably wind up supporting an writer’s collective, and the added bonus of a Faustus ride. (I’m assuming I’m cute.)

    Reply
  3. Will the free sex be occurring in the half hour gaps between the posts? My, you’d be knackered – but it would certainly give you something to blog about. Will that be your theme?

    Reply
  4. Kem says:

    Hmmm, I’ve never pledged anyone before — once the blogathon is over and the pledges are due, how does the theatre collect? Online? Or will I need to send a personal check to the address here?

    Reply
  5. Crash says:

    Okay, Faustus, I just sponsored you. Now I’m sure the pledges will start rolling in because everyone wants to be like me.

    Reply
  6. Jeff says:

    Just remember, I was first.

    I rather like the idea of blogging on the half hour in between shags. What do you think?

    Reply
  7. Crash says:

    Since when does shagging only take 30 minutes or less?

    Reply
  8. Wayne says:

    30 minutes gap? What are you talking about. I mean, the special ‘bonus’ can take place while Faustus is typing the blog. Who knows, maybe during the 26 – 27, we get to read mini short eroticas here, on “Search for Love in Manhatten.”

    Reply
  9. Mandy says:

    OK, so I’m a girl and I pledged. So no free sex for me… I have no cute boy parts. Faustus, would you pledge to me to have sex with a random cute boy instead?

    Reply
  10. John says:

    My reticence actually had nothing to do with lack of charm or wit on your part, or lack of confidence in my own status as a cute boy, or any of the other possible explanations that have been mentioned (well, ok, the too broke to pay for anything but food and internet thing had something do with it). Rather, having no idea what you look like, I had no way of knowing if you are a cute boy, and thus wasn’t sure if I would want the free sex. But you guilted me into it, and given what you’ve revealed about your age and measurements it would seem almost physically impossible that you could be that much less appealing than some past tricks. So, in the interest of a less Disneyfied musical theater, I stand ready to make the sacrifice!

    Reply
  11. Adam807 says:

    Faustus, I have to say it’s hard for me to give $25 to yet another tiny theatre company when I consistently refuse to give $25 to all those organizations who send me mail claiming to be curing AIDS or cancer, or feeding the homeless or whatever. Especially since at the moment I’m trying desperately to find a slightly larger theatre company that will give ME money!

    But I promise to read every half-hour…

    Reply
  12. Angelo says:

    Faustus,

    You know I would never hesitate to splurge my entire livelihood for the chance to make whoopie with you, but seeing that I’m halfway across the globe–in a smoke-filled Internet cafe in Greece to be exact–I’d have no way of collecting my prize.

    Unless, of course, if you’d agree to phone sex?

    Reply
  13. Re the last comment, from Angelo.

    It all sounds very Greek, whatever the outcome.

    (Sorry – I’ll get my coat…)

    Reply

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